What If Your Favorite Movie Characters Crossed Paths?

Posted by Jadzia Axelrod

Cinemaps by Andrew DeGraff and A.D. Jameson diagrams the paths characters take in popular films, as if they were following a map. But roads on a map often intersect, so it's hard not to imagine what these cinematic crossroads might look like. Here our some of our favorite movie and television characters, and how their lives might be different if they crossed paths.

 

Back to the Future / Blue Velvet

After hurtling back in time to escape vengeance-crazed Libyan terrorists, Marty McFly accidently keeps his parents from meeting and his teen-aged future father is arrested in connection to a mysterious murder. Marty teams up with Jeffery Beaumont and Sandy Williams, two teenagers also investigating the murder. Marty’s doggedness to prove his dad’s innocence leads to him snooping in suspicious lounge singer’s apartment. She catches him there, and forces him to undress at knife-point, amused at his Calvin Klein underwear. Marty insists that’s his name, and hides in the closet when violent psychopath Frank Booth enters the apartment. Everything comes to a head in a bizarre battle of the bands where Frank Booth’s partner in crime Ben lip-syncs to Roy Orbison’s “In Dreams” while Marty does an impromptu version of Chuck Berry’s “Johnny B Good.”

 

The Goonies / Stranger Things

An on-the-run Eleven meets up with Mikey, Mouth, Chunk and Data, is quickly made an honorary Goonie and joins them on hunt for the pirate treasure of “One-Eyed” Willy. Protective of her new friends, Eleven immeadiatly kills the violent Fratelli family, and helps them through a variety of booby traps with her impressive mental powers. Meanwhile, the demogorgon kidnaps Stef, nerdy best friend of Mikey’s older brother’s girlfriend. Eventually, Eleven battles the demogorgon, setting free the pirate ship as it sails off to sea.

 

Spider-Man / Royal Tenenbaums

After Spider-Man saves the young Uzi and Ari Tenenbaum from an oncoming car as a result of their grandfather Royal encouraging them to run across traffic, Royal invites the costumed superhero to meet the rest of the family. Spider-Man awkwardly accepts, and ends up fitting right in to the family, identifying with Chas’s insecurities and falling hopelessly in love with Margot. Spider-Man finds himself spending more and more time at the brownstone, which means he’s able to rush Richie to the hospital in record time after a suicide attempt. But it brings out the worst in Eli, the Tenenabum’s childhood neighbor, who ends up crashing the Green Goblin’s glider into the side of the house.

 

Psycho / Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas

Taking a wrong turn at Barstow, Raoul Duke and his attorney, Dr. Gonzo, end up at the Bates Motel, and decide to crash there for the night. A seemingly pleasant conversation with the proprietor, Norman Bates, leads to a potentially violent argument as Duke believes taxidermy décor has come back to life, and Gonzo expresses a desire to carve a little “z” in Bates’s forehead. Later that night, Bates’s second personality of his mother takes hold, and she attempts to murder the two boarders. Duke and Gonzo are too deep into a soaring trip to even notice anything odd about a young man dressed as an old woman trying to kill them—“not the first time this has happened,” Duke wryly comments—and they end up introducing Bates to LSD. Three days later, Duke wakes up in the flooded motel room with little memory of what just happened, and he and Gonzo peel out before paying the bill.

Jadzia Axelrod

Jadzia Axelrod

Jadzia Axelrod is an author, an illustrator, and a world changer. Throughout her eventful life she has also been a circus performer, a puppeteer, a graphic designer, a sculptor, a costume designer, a podcaster and quite a few other things that she’s lost track of but will no doubt remember when the situation calls for it.She is the writer and producer of “The Voice Of Free Planet X” podcast, were she interviews stranded time-travelers, low-rent superheroes, unrepentant monsters and other such creature of sci-fi and fantasy, as well as the podcasts “Aliens You Will Meet” and “Fables Of The Flying City.” The story started in “Fables Of The Flying City” is concluded in The Battle Of Blood & Ink, a graphic novel published by Tor.She is not domestic, she is a luxury, and in that sense, necessary.