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Is there a partner more perfect, more amiable than a book lover? As a book lover, I can say with absolutely no bias whatsoever, no, there is not. Now and then folks may speak to “problems” with being in the company of book lovers, and to that I say, are these problems? Or do they just not appreciate everything we book lovers bring to the world? In the interest of education, here is a selection of book lover qualities that are in no way, shape, or form, a problem to anyone.

 

1) An ever-increasing stack of "to reads" on your bedside table

Is there a better home décor item than a book? Of course not. And why keep such a wonderful curio on a shelf, when it can be placed on the bedside table, for easy reach? Why, the “to read” stack is a perfect marriage of form and function. Let’s see a vase of flowers compete with that!

 

2) The dance of the comfortable reading position

Expression through movement can be absolutely breathtaking, as the human body is pushed past its limits of strength and flexibility. Such then, is the spectacle of a book lover, as the body is twisted and contorted in order to be at maximum comfort. But this is not a dance of the body alone; props are frequently employed. Whatever furniture, pillows, books they aren’t reading, pets that happened to get too close and heaven knows what else will be enveloped in the dance, all in the pursuit of the perfect configuration for reading.

 

3) Constantly heavy bags

There is no one more powerful than the book lover, due the weight of their backpacks, purses, totes, bookbags, etc. Weighted down with knowledge, weighted down with joy, weighted down with endless pages of adventure, romance and sorrows, but weighted nonetheless. No one is training for the coming Road Warrior apocalyptic wasteland harder than the book lover, who hauls tons of reading material every single day.

 

4) Eternal patience

Think it stinks waiting months for the next season of your favorite show come out? Try waiting YEARS. Sometimes DECADES. A true book lover understands that quality art cannot be rushed, but can you imagine the patience required to wait who knows how long for resolution to cliffhanger about one’s favorite character?!? Every book lover who endures this torment without complaining is a saint. And maybe even the ones who complain, too. They are, after all, still waiting.

 

5) An appreciation of life’s simple pleasures

The best things in life are free, it is said. Which is great news to the book lover, who’s already spent all their money on handful of new releases, an armful of used classics, and a couple of special editions.

 

6) The bookstore/library "pop in"

This is perhaps, the most gracious gift a book lover can give their companion. Who among us does not crave solitude, a deep-seated longing for time alone? A book lover can give you that. For within a book store or library, time truly has no meaning. Hours may pass, and the book lover will realize it not at all. With a book lover, your unspoken desire to be left alone for an extended period of time will be met time and time again!


Quirk Tested. Reader Approved.

Jared Axelrod's picture

Jared Axelrod

Jared Axelrod is an author, an illustrator, and a world changer. Throughout her eventful life she has also been a circus performer, a puppeteer, a graphic designer, a sculptor, a costume designer, a podcaster and quite a few other things that she’s lost track of but will no doubt remember when the situation calls for it. She is the writer and producer of “The Voice Of Free Planet X” podcast, were she interviews stranded time-travelers, low-rent superheroes, unrepentant monsters and other such creature of sci-fi and fantasy, as well as the podcasts “Aliens You Will Meet” and “Fables Of The Flying City.” The story started in “Fables Of The Flying City” is concluded in The Battle Of Blood & Ink, a graphic novel published by Tor. She is not domestic, she is a luxury, and in that sense, necessary.