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A banana split is traditionally an ice cream-based dessert. But with a little imagination, you can make one with other things...even books. Although a book banana split may not be as delicious to your tongue as the real thing, its ingredients can be rather satiating to your soul.

 

Step One: The Banana

The banana is the spiritual foundation of a banana split, obviously. It is also the structural foundation. You’ll need a dense, sturdy banana. In this case, a large hardcover book – for example, the National Geographic Concise History of the World: An Illustrated Time Line. Split it lengthwise down the middle and it will hold the other ingredients in place while providing a digestible, historical background flavor.

 

Step 2 - The ice cream

Whenever ice cream is involved, it's the star of the show. Despite the name, a banana split is all about the ice cream. Add at least three scoops! Traditionally, you’d have a scoop of vanilla, chocolate, and strawberry, but we have some extra flavorful scoops of A Song of Ice and Fire books.

Like a scoop of mint chocolate chip, A Storm of Swords combines two boldly different flavors. There are the joyous celebrations of marriage interrupted by dark chunks of death and despair.

A Feast for Crow is a scoop of black cherry — a rather mild flavor compared to the previous one. It has hints of restoring order through a child king and escaping turmoil only to become an assassin.

And finally, we add a scoop of cookies and cream in A Dance with Dragons. While mostly smooth and straightforward, there are more hard dark bits like a disobedient dragon and a long walk of shame.

 

Now that we have the base and the filling, all we have left to add are the toppings. Like whipped cream, Wiener Dog Art: A Far Side Collection is very fluffy and fun, containing humorous cartoons of uncomfortable social situations, anthromorphic animals and pets, and lots of really, really dumb humans. It's a light finishing touch that will sweeten the heavy flavors of Westerosi events and Earthling history.

 

There you have it, a Book Banana Split. Complete with the banana base, three scoops of ice cream filling, a light topping, and the whipped cream. Bonus — the red wiener dog print on the back cover is the cherry on top!

You won’t need a spoon to enjoy it. Just a comfy chair. 


Quirk Tested. Reader Approved.