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It’s the final season of Schitt’s Creek and we’re feeling very peculiar about it. One minute we’re sad to see David and Patrick and everyone else leave us forever, the next we’re telling everyone we know that we’re happy the show is ending on its own terms. What? You haven’t had a thirty-minute conversation with your favorite barista about the many wigs of Moira Rose? And why not? So today, as we both celebrate and hold vigil for our favorite show on television, we’re exploring the five books we’d love to see in Rose Apothecary before the end of the season.

 

 

The Astrology of You and Me by Gary Goldschneider

We’ve never heard David Rose talk explicitly about astrology, but we know he’s constantly trying to guess the moon sign of every one of the Rose Apothecary regulars. The Astrology of You and Me would not only fly off the shelves at the store, it would also be a fun way to pass the time when business is less than stellar. Thank god they weren’t carrying it when Patrick and David first started going out because one or both of them would have definitely used the book to second guess their very real feelings – feelings that transcend all astrological compatibility.

Buy the book:

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Books A MillionIndieBound

 

 

Basic Witches by Jaya Saxena and Jess Zimmerman

Not only does the cover of Basic Witches match the color palate of Rose Apothecary, it also matches the store’s overall vibe. Despite David’s high energy and tendency to blow things out of proportion, he’s relatively drama free. Plus, he has a pretty tight coven – only letting in Patrick and Stevie, with the occasional input from Alexis. It’s the kind of book that will both frighten and intrigue the residents of Schitt’s Creek. (We don’t even know how they feel about Halloween!) And we’re pretty sure that the town’s healthy curiosity will sell a bunch of copies.

Buy the book:

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Books A MillionIndieBound

 

 

Little Weirds by Jenny Slate

Jenny Slate’s own small-town upbringing – and current small-town life – will fit in perfectly with the clientele of Rose Apothecary. This book of short essays, some autobiographical and poetic, others magical and toeing the line between essay and micro fiction, shares a pace and tone with the residents of Schitt’s Creek. It’s both weird and beautiful, indulgent and understated. And we know Jocelyn will recognize Slate from her author photo, even if she can’t quite place her.

Buy the book:

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Books A MillionIndieBound

 

 

Red, White, and Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston

Schitt’s Creek is a town without homophobia, so it’s only fitting that we start lobbying Rose Apothecary to start carrying books with queer protagonists. Red, White, and Royal Blue is our vote. We read it in 48 hours; that’s how good it is. We know that David is in charge of pretty much all the creative decisions of the store, but we can very easily see Patrick sneaking this onto the stock list, creating a town wide fanbase of Alex + Henry fans. We love a good accidental book club, and Red, White, and Royal Blue will give Schitt’s Creek residents plenty to talk about.

Buy the book:

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Books A MillionIndieBound

 

 

Becoming by Michelle Obama

What Schitt’s Creek resident doesn’t love Michelle Obama? We know, we know. They’re all Canadian residents with no real ties to the former first lady of the United States. But seriously, what Schitt’s Creek resident doesn’t love Michelle Obama? If David and Patrick carried Becoming at Rose Apothecary, every single copy would sell out. She’s just that wonderful.

Buy the book:

Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Books A MillionIndieBound


A Book You May Enjoy

Danielle Mohlman's picture

Danielle Mohlman

Danielle Mohlman is a playwright, bookworm, and library connoisseur. You can find her on Twitter and Tumblr. (She has a lot to say.) And on Instagram. (She never foodstagrams.) When she grows up, she wants to be Leslie Knope.