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Monkeyfarts!

From classic favorites to zany newcomers, Monkeyfarts! is packed to bursing with wild and wacky jokes about monsters, pirates, polar bears, super-heroes, hot dogs, Harry Potter, Vikings, elephants, vampires, and more. With hilarious jokes and bold illustrations, it’s the only joke book you’ll ever need. Who doesn’t love Monkeyfarts!?

Posted by impart

The Onion Presents: Love, Sex, and Other Natural Disasters

Here are more than one hundred news stories of high-school sweethearts, college hook-ups, dating disasters, weddings, divorces, and restraining orders. From “18-Year-Old Miraculously Finds Soulmate In Hometown” to “Couple Forgets 70th Wedding Anniversary,” these reports capture the heartbreak and hilarity of the human experience.

The Onion is America’s Finest News Source. It is the last bastion of unbiased, reliable, and definitive news in a world dominated by superficiality, mediocrity, and non-Onion news outlets. Since its founding back in 1988, The Onion has expanded into an omnipotent news empire reaching millions of fans through print, broadcast, radio, online, and mobile outlets. Today, The Onion misinforms more than 1.5 million readers in print and 7.5 million online each month.

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The Onion Presents: Love, Sex, and Other Natural Disasters

Here are more than one hundred news stories of high-school sweethearts, college hook-ups, dating disasters, weddings, divorces, and restraining orders. From “18-Year-Old Miraculously Finds Soulmate In Hometown” to “Couple Forgets 70th Wedding Anniversary,” these reports capture the heartbreak and hilarity of the human experience.

The Onion is America’s Finest News Source. It is the last bastion of unbiased, reliable, and definitive news in a world dominated by superficiality, mediocrity, and non-Onion news outlets. Since its founding back in 1988, The Onion has expanded into an omnipotent news empire reaching millions of fans through print, broadcast, radio, online, and mobile outlets. Today, The Onion misinforms more than 1.5 million readers in print and 7.5 million online each month.

Posted by impart

Broetry

As contemporary poets sing the glories of birds and birch trees, regular guys are left scratching their heads. Who can speak for Everyman? Who will articulate his love for Xbox 360, for Mama Celeste’s frozen pizza, for the cinematic oeuvre of Bruce Willis? 

Enter Broetry—a stunning debut from a dazzling new literary voice. “Broet Laureate” Brian McGackin goes where no poet has gone before—to Star Wars conventions, to frat parties, to video game tournaments, and beyond. With poems like “Ode to That Girl I Dated for, Like, Two Months Sophomore Year” and “My Friends Who Don’t Have Student Loans,” we follow the Bro from his high school graduation and college experience through a “quarter-life crisis” and beyond.

Posted by impart

Yo Momma So Extraordinary

For generations, young men have used Yo Momma jokes to torment their closest friends (e.g., “Yo momma so ugly, they filmed Gorillas in the Mist in her shower!”).

But here at Quirk, we reject these cruel and hurtful insults. We want to show yo momma the love and respect she deserves. And so we’ve created Yo Momma So Extraordinary—the first-ever book of Yo Momma compliments. This is how we roll:

❤ Yo momma so considerate, she puts sheets on the couch when I stay over so it looks like I slept on it.

❤ Yo momma so hygienic, she sings the whole birthday song while she washes her hands to ensure that they are clean.

❤ Yo momma has so many cats, it’s like DAAAAAMN! Which one should I pet first?

❤ Yo momma so old, I sometimes question if what we have together is right.

Illustrated with dozens of ridiculously funny photographs of Mommas (and the men who love them), this odd little book will make a wonderful Mother’s Day gift for the quirky momma in yo life.

ZACHARY REESE and ETHAN MCCREADIE are computer nerds living in Philadelphia. They enjoy video games, snacks, and long walks on the beach with yo momma.

Posted by impart

Jokes Every Man Should Know

Why are most joke books so terrible? Why do they always resort to the same tired stereotypes, awful puns, and contrived situations?

Answer: Because good jokes-really good jokes-are as rare as precious gems. Writer and humorist Don Steinberg was not interested in compiling a thousand gags into a giant paperback, because he knew most of the content would be dreck. Instead, he set out to compile the very best of the best, the cream of the crop, the Jokes Every Man Should Know.

Here are jokes for business trips, blind dates, and family get-togethers. Here are eight jokes that will make kids laugh and nineteen jokes that are not at all suitable for children. Here are two jokes about gorillas, three jokes about doctors, one joke involving an alligator and oral sex, eight jokes about heaven, and the world’s only funny knock-knock joke. Packaged in a sleek hardcover format, Jokes Every Man Should Know has the perfect punch line for every occasion.

DON STEINBERG has contributed to The New Yorker, GQ, Harper’s, McSweeney’s, Spy, Entertainment Weekly, the New York Times, the Philadelphia Inquirer, and other publications. His Web site, bluedonut.com, is a real hoot.

Posted by impart