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As we gear up for Jane Austen's birthday next month, here's her birthday haul video from last year! One of our favorites!

Hello and a hearty welcome return, ladies and gentles. It’s Jane. Welcome back to my channel. I suppose this is what one might refer to as a ‘haul video,’ wherein I intend to detail the gifts I received on my 20th birthday. I admit, I have not done one of these since years past, when I was far more youthful than I am presently. But they were quite well regarded then, so I suppose there will be no shame in diving into this acculturation of wealth and high regard for not yet finding a way to destroy myself for another year.

 

I intend to keep trying, obviously.

 

If you wish to know about the party, the absolutely shocking outfit Aribella wore, and Gadston’s inability to dance that left me doubled over gasping for my very life through uncontrollable laughter, click the link here. I imagine most of you are faithful subscribers and have already see it. But for those of you who are knew my videos…this is hardly the finest video to start with. Please, choose another and come back to this one when you are in a more charitable frame of mind.

 

Let us begin with this gift from my Mother and Father. Such a handbag, is it not? Already it has become a beloved favorite, as it just adorable. Perhaps more than one dorable? Several. Several dorables, that is my judgment. I have already moved my carmine powder and lip pomade in here, as you can see. I carry it everywhere I need to be, and the places I don’t need to be, I simply don’t bother going.

 

My dearest grandmamma gave me this necklace, by which I mean, went to the jewelers and purchased it with the money my grandmamma sent. I did take her personal style into account, and having exhausted her meager boundaries of fashion, I picked out this instead. I believe she would appreciate the silver, as she considers gold to be the jewelry of harlots and loose women.

 

In any case, I find this pendant to be so cute. I wear it every day, as it goes with everything and everything goes with it.

 

It was my sister Cassandra, the artist, who’s work I cannot and will not cease speaking highly of in these videos, no matter how much it embarrasses her. She is across the room even now, and her normally fair complexion now resembles nothing so much as strawberry. As it is a delightful shade for her, I shall continue. This gift, a silhouette portrait drawn of my ridiculous face drawn by her own hand, has now reached the epitome of my most prized possession. I have already replaced all previous avatars on my social medias with this image, for I do love it so.

 

The last gift, I am afraid, I shall have to leave in private. For those of you have seen my party video—have not already? Waiting will not make it any sweeter than it is right now—you realize I and my Irish friend spent a considerable amount of the party together. I am almost afraid to tell you how my Irish friend and I behaved. Imagine to yourself everything most profligate and shocking in the way of dancing and sitting down together. He gave me a gift that evening, which I believe I shall keep locked away in my heart. Some thing are to be cherished away from YouTube.

 

Gadston also saw fit to give me a gift, and since Cassadra is giving me the face that she uses to encourage me to say nice things, I shall not tell you how I truly feel about Gadston’s present. I will say instead that one day, Gadston, you shall give a lady a present which will thrill her very heart and soul. Judging upon the recent evidence, that day will be a long time coming, indeed.

 

I wish you all a good morrow, and many thanks for watching all the way to finish. Please, if you have any affection in your heart, like and subscribe, and I shall see you in a fortnight!


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Jared Axelrod

Jared Axelrod is an author, an illustrator, and a world changer. Throughout her eventful life she has also been a circus performer, a puppeteer, a graphic designer, a sculptor, a costume designer, a podcaster and quite a few other things that she’s lost track of but will no doubt remember when the situation calls for it. She is the writer and producer of “The Voice Of Free Planet X” podcast, were she interviews stranded time-travelers, low-rent superheroes, unrepentant monsters and other such creature of sci-fi and fantasy, as well as the podcasts “Aliens You Will Meet” and “Fables Of The Flying City.” The story started in “Fables Of The Flying City” is concluded in The Battle Of Blood & Ink, a graphic novel published by Tor. She is not domestic, she is a luxury, and in that sense, necessary.