An Excerpt from
By Paula Skaggs and Josh Linden
For When You Have to Send a Scary Email: A Foolproof Checklist
You can’t just hover your mouse over SEND for forever. Plus, if you were to die under mysterious circumstances before you hit SEND and came back as a ghost, wouldn’t you be so disappointed that sending this email was your unfinished business? You’re too cool for that!
Follow this handy checklist, and you’ll be sending that scary email out into cyberspace in no time.
Did you spell the name(s) of the recipient(s) correctly?
Did you confirm that you didn’t accidentally call anyone “sweetie” or “shithead” or include the phrase “I love you” anywhere in the email?
Did! You! Remove! Every! Unnecessary! Exclamation! Point?!?!?!?!
Wait, is the email too cold now? Maybe add back in a couple of those exclamation points so you seem more likeable!
Read the email aloud to yourself. Be honest: does it sound like you, a Real Human Being, or more like you’re an alien doing an impression of a Very Fancy Businessperson?
Check again: Are you sure the names are right? Or did you put in an i or y in the wrong place in Hayleigh?
Is there anything in this email that you don’t actually want to put in writing, for fear of it coming back to bite you later? Like your real thoughts about your boss or all your bank account information along with a comprehensive list of your passwords?
Is any part of the email written in a font you’d describe as fun? (It’s not. Remove it immediately.)
If you said you attached a file, did you actually attach a file? And is it the correct file, or did you attach a top-secret file containing state secrets that an enemy planted on your computer to destabilize the government?
Just check one more time—are you sure the name is right? If so, you’re good to send!
About the Book
Bite-Size Encouragement for Life’s Annoying, Stressful, and Flat-Out Lousy Moments
by Paula Skaggs and Josh Linden
Two comedians offer hilarious encouragement for your most mundane struggles.
Anybody can tell you “You can do it!” before the big job interview, or before you walk down the aisle, or before you blast off on the first human-powered mission to Mars. But who’s going to gas you up for all of life’s low-stakes situations when you need an extra push?
Comedians Paula Skaggs and Josh Linden are here to cheerlead you through your daily challenges. You’ll find specific, constructive, and—most of all—very funny motivation for:
- Sending a scary email (if you died and came back as a ghost, wouldn’t it suck if this was your unfinished business?)
- Getting through a breakup (did you know the grocery store will sell you a cake on any day for any reason?)
Remembering that all your friends are not secretly mad at you (they’re busy worrying all their friends are secretly mad at them) - …and many more!
If you’re going through it, have ever gone through it, or will maybe go through it in the future, let Tiny Pep Talks give you the boost you need.