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To Quote a Queer

We’re here. We’re queer. And we’re hilarious! Not to mention eloquent, bitchy, poetic, luminous, and dead-on brilliant! To Quote a Queer features more than 2,500 quotations on a host of subjects, including:

Body Image: “To be gay and out of shape is almost as much of a stigma as just being gay used to be.”—Bruce Vilanch

Fashion: “If I am occasionally a little overdressed, I make up for it by being always immensely overeducated.”—Oscar Wilde

Homophobia: “A lot of people are not homophobic, but they think they’re supposed to be. They think that if they don’t express prejudice, people will think there’s something the matter with them.”—Barney Frank

Therapy: “I think I have OCD or ADD or some other three-initial ditty. Whatever it is, it’s exhauasting.”—Rosie O’Donnell

Truth: “I don’t care what anybody says about me as long as it isn’t true.”—Truman Capote

Childhood: “Bike-riding and tree-climbing may be typically boyish, but they were merely means to my sissified ends; I wanted, like an eight-year-old Garbo, to be alone.”—Dan Savage

Coming Out: “What happened to me is exactly the opposite of what closeted people fear. They think they’ll lose everything if they come out. This did not happen to me at all. In fact, everything came back tenfold.”—Melissa Etheridge

Fame: “When you become a public figure, you become at the same time a product, and people actually look at your ‘expiration date,’ you know? They look at your age and say, ‘Hmm. How fresh is this one?’”—RuPaul

And much more. Hitting shelves just in time for summer’s pride festivities, To Quote a Queer is the perfect gift for gays and the people who love them.

JOHN LESSARD is assistant professor of English and film studies at the University of the Pacific in Stockton, California.

Posted by impart

How to Survive a Horror Movie

Written by best-selling author, screenwriter, and producer Seth Grahame-Smith (Stephen King’s It), with an introduction by horror icon Wes Craven (A Nightmare on Elm Street), this is a hilarious must-read for any horror movie fan…and it just might save your life.

Are you reading this in a cornfield, at a summer camp, or in an abandoned mental institution? Have you noticed that everything is poorly lit, or that music surges every time you open a door? If the answer is yes, you’re probably trapped in a horror movie. But don’t freak out—just read this book! With it you will learn how to overcome every obstacle found in scary films, including:

• How to determine what type of horror film you’re trapped in
• The five types of slashers and how to defeat them
• How to handle killer dolls, murderous automobiles, and other haunted objects
• How to deal with alien invasions, zombie apocalypses, and other global threats
• What to do if you did something last summer, if your corn has children in it, or if you suspect you’re already dead

Posted by impart

Night of the Living Trekkies

Journey to the final frontier of sci-fi zombie horror!
 
Jim Pike was the world’s biggest Star Trek fan—until two tours of duty in Afghanistan destroyed his faith in the human race. Now he sleepwalks through life as the assistant manager of a small hotel in downtown Houston.
 
But when hundreds of Trekkies arrive in his lobby for a science-fiction convention, Jim finds himself surrounded by costumed Klingons, Vulcans, and Ferengi—plus a strange virus that transforms its carriers into savage, flesh-eating zombies!
 
As bloody corpses stumble to life and the planet teeters on the brink of total apocalypse, Jim must deliver a ragtag crew of fanboys and fangirls to safety. Dressed in homemade uniforms and armed with prop phasers, their prime directive is to survive. But how long can they last in the ultimate no-win scenario?

Posted by impart