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It’s time for another poem from Brian McGackin’s Broetry!

Last week, we tackled the beginnings of the universe. This week, it made sense to feature something almost as important: Harry Potter.

This poem tackles the male desire for sex, the female desire to share emotional intimacy, the universal human need for companionship, and the prospect of dressing up as witches and wizards to attend midnight book release parties. Also, I can personally attest to the fact that this poem is true to life: I did the exact same thing to my boyfriend.

Now I Assume That Everyone Named Harry Is a Wizard
From Broetry by Brian McGackin

Cold, late night so long ago,
some girl said, “These are good, you know.”
She handed me a novel;
it looked really fucking dumb.
I put it off for several weeks—
back then I wasn’t such a geek.
Actually, that’s bullshit. I was worse and I know it.
 
“Come on, read it,” she flirted and cooed.
“You don’t have to love it, though it is really good.”
So try to understand . . .
Try to understand . . .
Try, try, try to understand . . .
I was fifteen and she was really cute.
 
Days and days I read and read,
just to get this girl in bed.
“Wingardium leviosa. Alohomora.”
So, once I’d finished every one
I went to tell her what I’d done.
Ya know, I had to admit that I really enjoyed it.
 
“Then come along, please,” she begged with a pout.
“I need someone to join me when the new book
comes out.
But try to understand . . .
Try to understand . . .
Try, try, try to understand . . .
It means dressing like wizards in public.”
 
~pensive moment/actually considering it/musical interlude~
 
“Come on! No way!” I said to that chick.
“Yeah, I’d like to fuck you, sure, but this is ridic.
But try to understand . . .
Try to understand . . .
Try, try, try to understand . . .
You can totally call me when you’re done.”
 
~another thoughtful moment of silence/longer interlude this time~
 
“Please come with me,” she finally said.
“Maybe, if you’re good, we’ll go and read in my bed.”
So try to understand . . .
Try to understand . . .
Try, try, try to understand . .
.

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For more information on Broetry by Brian McGackin, visit the book's offficial page. To chat with Brian, like his Facebook page and follow him on Twitter.